In 2021, inspired by Elevation Worship’s song “Million Little Miracles” I started a different sort of journal. I began recording one way God had shown himself present in my life that very day and another from my past. 

Sometimes they reflect His sense of humor and reminder that He stands outside time – like when I was in an absurd battle with the city over banners and my Bible study on the Names of God “coincidentally” focused on His name Jehovah Nissi “the Lord is my banner.” 

Sometimes they show his fatherly kind attention – like when Andrew was a toddler and I’d promised him a visit to Chuck E. Cheese when he memorized Psalm 23. An unexpected financial tragedy occurred that made keeping that promise impossible, until God put it on the heart of our Sunday School leader to give me money with strict instructions to spend it at Chuck E. Cheese, though she had no clue why God was asking that of her.

Sometimes they demonstrate His unlimited power, as in moments I can testify to miraculous healings. 

And sometimes they show Him doing things for fun – in childhood I was on vacation with my friend’s family in NYC and we were robbed. But months later in the mail a package showed up returning some of the items that were stolen – my Lord of the Rings books I’d saved up to purchase with my own money, and a journal with signatures of the famous people I’d met in my eleven years of life. I learned in that moment that God cared about the seemingly insignificant hurts of my little heart, and that He cared about them even more than I did.

It’s why I believe our testimony changes every day – because every day He is present, active, and showing His irrational delight in each of us.

Reflecting on His past expressions of love is what strengthens me in moments of confusion. And sharing that (the Bible calls it testifying) is the part we get to play in defeating the enemy of our soul.

There is an inherent danger though in seeking His activity in our lives. We can misinterpret what He’s doing. I did that in a BIG way once and it led to a massive crisis of faith. He’d led us to this gorgeous old house on S Brooksville Ave and placed an entire ministry plan instantly in my head. I thought it meant He was giving us that house and was subsequently devastated when someone else got it. I now understand He was giving me a glimpse of the work I would do at Chinsegut and it was intended to strengthen me for the difficult time we were heading for at our church before Chinsegut would be birthed. But I took His gift and instead of letting it strengthen me I let it derail my trust in His Goodness.

Ten years later, I can report that I have never again allowed myself to doubt His Goodness. I protect that Truth with ferocity because it is the foundation of my understanding of Him, the world He created, and the role I play in it.

God is Good and He promises to work out all things for the good for those who love Him. It definitely doesn’t mean He is to blame for the bad things that happen to us. It doesn’t mean there aren’t consequences when we sin or even just screw up accidentally. But it does mean He will redeem anything and everything if we give Him the chance.

God. Is. Good. 

And He is Jehovah Nissi. The Bible says the banner He has hanging above our head simply says “Love.” I think that’s pretty cool. And I love Him too.